This is the most common question asked by massage clients and the answer is based on several things: - How physically active are you? - How healthy is your body? - What is your stress level? - Do you suffer from disease or inflammation that causes problems? - How well do you take care of yourself? - How long does your body hold the affects of a massage? - What is your budget? These are just a few things to consider when deciding how often to schedule a massage. As you can see, there isn’t one answer that fits every body. A good rule of thumb is your level of self-care should maintain your body according to how much you demand of it. If you are a competitive athlete, you should be getting a massage 2-3 times a week to help with recovery by removing waste products from the muscle cells, keeping muscles pliable and cells hydrated. The more you demand of your body the bigger risk of injury, however on the flip side, if you are sedentary you risk weak muscles that won’t support normal use and you also risk injury. Bodies were made to work and be used. If you are working out on a regular basis, 20-30 minutes, 2-5 times a week and keeping your body strong by walking, strength training, Pilates, yoga, running, etc., you probably would feel better with a massage once a week or twice a month, depending on your budget and how long your body feels good between massages. Stress levels make a big difference in your physical and mental health and can cause havoc with healthy bodies when life events, job issues, family problems or health issues crop up. Scheduling massage once a week or every other week during times of increased stress will support you mentally and physically by releasing endorphins and dopamine into your system. Long-term stress, injury or disease increases the need for massage. Injury usually requires more massage for a short time and then the need decreases as the body heals. Frequency of massage is also dependent on how serious the injury is. Some diseases such as arthritis, fibromyalgia, cancer, stenosis, depression, scoliosis, etc. feel better with regular massage and many clients come in at least once a month or more to keep their discomfort to a minimum. When deciding how often you need massage, pay attention to how long you feel good after your massage? You can increase the length of time between massages by making sure to keep your body hydrated, keep muscles pliable by stretching, using proper body mechanics when lifting and having healthy ways of dealing with stresses of living. Budget is a major concern for most massage clients and some questions to ask yourself might be -- Is spending the money on massage now going to help decrease health costs down the road? Will massage alleviate my problem without more expensive pharmaceuticals and/or surgery? How much is your comfort a priority at this point in your life? Taking time out and spending the money for self-care is a challenge for everyone. Discussing your individual needs with your therapist is always a good idea and pre-scheduling your massages strengthens the commit to self-care. Keeping yourself healthy and your energy charged up, you have more to give others, a happier outlook on life and better quality of life. Massage can be a big help in doing just that! Just call me QL, for short. When I hurt, it feels like I am a back muscle, but I am the deepest abdominal muscle and it is easier to reach me from the back of the body. I sit between your ribs and hips, just under those long ropy muscles, the Erector Spinae, that go all the way down your back. I don’t get much time off because I always working. I help stabilize your spine when you are upright, I assist with turning and twisting and I am nicknamed “The Hip Hiker” because I can raise one side or the other of the pelvis. Belly dancing and Hula are just a couple of things I am good at. I have some other tricky things I do like extending the lumbar spine and helping your diaphragm contract when you cough. If you golf, I help you hit a long drive and in tennis I help your swing either direction. I am connected to your last rib, down the lumbar spine and along the top of the pelvis and you have one of me on both sides. If you have ever moved heavy furniture or stacked heavy boxes, you probably felt pain in your mid-back, butt or even down your leg because when I hurt and go into spasm I cause all kinds of pain in different places, so it can be difficult to figure out who the culprit is. I am sneaky that way! I am also pretty friendly with other muscles and when I throw a pain party I like to invite my friends, Psoas, Piriformis and sometimes Iliopsoas but we aren’t that close. Here is a picture of me and a couple of friends: Here is a video showing how to take care of me. QL Stretching video If you do exercises that strengthen your abdominals/core, you are helping me be strong and healthy and I won’t cause you a lot of pain. It was nice to meet you and I will always be here doing my job as long as you take care of me. I don't have TV or read newspapers. I find that most of the news is bad and I get overwhelmed and depressed. I have to limit my exposure, so I skim headlines on the internet and read just enough to feel like I am in touch but sometimes there is such bad news there is no escaping the negative feelings that are triggered. The shootings of nine people in a church by a mixed up young man was horrible. I want to believe in the best of ourselves but there is still so much of our darker nature that exists. Sometimes I feel useless as to how I can do anything but just feel sad and pain for the many that are suffering. I am sure some of you have felt the same way. Being only one person, how can you make any difference in this big world? There are two things you can do that seem insignificant but as Mahatma Ghandi said, "Be the change you wish to see in the world" and anything big started as something small, so just focus on your little corner of the world. 1 - Smile at everyone you see. You might be having a rough day, but are you the only one? Your smile might just make the difference in someone's day that helps them through unimaginable pain or suffering. By smiling you also lift up your own spirits and I bet you end up having a great day regardless of how it started. What about the guy that flips you off as he cuts in front of you? My mother always said, "Kill them with kindness" and I just smile and wave and try not to take it personally. Easier said than done, but I do try. 2 - Give hugs. Touch is so important to all living things. I have written about how touch affects the mortality rates of infants. Touch is behind the reason we have three times the number of pets than people because most of us feel more comfortable petting a dog or cat instead of reaching out to another person. As a single person I am more guilty than anyone I know...I have four dogs, so I'm not pointing any fingers here. I learned a long time ago the power of hugging. I had a friend that owned a business two doors down from my business and every morning she came a gave me a hug. At first it was a little uncomfortable because I came from a very stoic family and we didn't hug, but after awhile, if she didn't come to my shop, I would go to hers and get my hug. Numerous times I have not had the words to say to someone that was hurting, but a hug was just what they needed. If a hug isn't welcome, just a touch on the arm or hand will let them know you care. So this week I am issueing a challenge to all my readers and clients...go forth and make a difference! Smile and hug people. Create the happiest little corner on earth. If you come in for a massage, be prepared for a hug. Just for fun, you might want to watch some videos of kids doing hug experiements. Here are a couple of links: _https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d7BS_Z4jlgE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D40FnLs1g-k I would love to hear how your week of smiles and hugs went. Please email me or put your experience in the comments below. You don't actually have knots in muscles. What you do have is a muscle, or group of muscle fibers that is not working properly and in a constant state of contraction, or spasm. The usual places that most people feel knots are upper neck, top of the shoulders, next to the shoulder blade near the spine, low back and in the butt muscle, but knots or trigger points can be found anywhere in the body. Muscle fibers are long strands of tissue that connect and move bones. These fibers contract and lengthen with use and slide along side each other. When a fiber constricts and stays shortened, it can interfere with the function of surrounding fibers. The constriction causes swelling, inflammation and pain. This swelling is what your massage therapist is feeling and what causes you pain when the area is touched or moved. When you have a muscle or group of muscle fibers within a muscle that have shortened and are not functioning correctly, it can result in loss of blood flow, lymph drainage and can affect movement. Protein fibers from the muscles can actually intertwine between fibers and they “hook” onto each other, restricting their sliding action. Studies have been done that show trigger points to have a build up of waste products such as lactic acid, pyruvic acid, protein build up from over use of the muscle and the break down of glycogen that feeds muscle tissue. With a lack of circulation waste products can't move out of the area and allow renewal of fresh blood and nutrients to the muscle. This can lead to a larger and more painful trigger point. Compression of a trigger point helps to release fascia, the thin layer surrounding the muscle and individual fibers and forces elongation of the muscle releasing the spasm and also forces the waste products from the area allowing fresh blood and nutrients in. Accupuncture is another affective technique for treating trigger points. Depending on the size and length of time the muscle has been in a “knot”, will determine whether the trigger point will be chronic or short-term. Massage to loosen muscles, Trigger Point to address individual problem areas, strengthening muscles with exercise and stretching muscles will help to keep “knots” at a minimum. Relaxing techniques such as meditation and biofeedback or just plain getting out in nature and moving your body will help with stress levels and a lowered level of stress helps the body be more relaxed and supple instead of tight and constricted. Have you experienced a "knot" and what kind of treatment did you get that worked? I get asked all the time what is the proper treatment for pain and injury and it all depends on several things:
- How old is the injury? - Is there bruising and/or swelling? - Is is soft tissue or bone? There is a rule of thumb that says that immediately after an injury to apply Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation (RICE). Doing this will usually help the healing and prevent additional swelling, except in the case of a broken bone. Apply the ice, but get to a doctor and make sure a bone isn't broken! If an injury is older than 24 hours, my personal opinion is that you have several choices but it depends on what type of injury it is. Bruising - Applying ice to a bruised area will only cause blood to continue pooling in that area, but heat can cause swelling and more bruising. My recommendation is to do an ice massage. Freeze water in a Dixie cup and rub the area for at least 20 minutes. It will be cold and red. This does two things; it brings new blood into the area with more oxygen and nutrients for the tissues and it helps the old blood flow out and take away inflammation. Swelling without bruising is usually helped better by ice compresses, but if movement is restricted, I would use the ice massage because just ice will cause tissue to contract and tighten. Pain without bruising or swelling - I tend to believe that we all react differently to cold and heat. I prefer heat because I don't like to be cold, but that might not be the case for you. If you prefer cold, use cold. If you don't know, try one or the other and see how your body responds. Soaking in a hot tub with 2 cups of Epsom salts will help or using a heating pad. If you have a bone bruise, it is going to take a long time to heal regardless of what you use, so just be patient. Soft tissue heals faster, especially if you begin treatment as soon as you are hurt. Icy Hot and treatments like it are, in my opinion, worthless. There are ingredients, like menthol or wintergreen, that cause a mild chemical reaction on the skin and make tissues feel hot or cold. It isn't actually reaching beyond the surface of the skin. It is a placebo effect. Aspirin helps with pain and swelling. Ibuprofen (Advil, Motrin, etc) is a muscle relaxer and anti-inflammatory. This means that it actually helping the healing process and reducing pain. I am also a fan of natural treatments like Traumeel, Arnica oil, etc. These have natural ingredients that are absorbed by the body and help with pain and swelling. I have used Traumeel on a client with a bad ankle sprain and it took the bruising out and reduced the swelling. Both will reduce pain. The best thing you can do with any injury is start with ice and then listen to your body and reduce your activity or movement until you feel better. If you have any questions, ask your doctor or friendly massage therapist :) What works best for you when you get hurt? Plating is the term used in the food industry that describes the process of laying out the parts of a meal to give it a special look and to make it more enticing and appetizing. Chopped up herbs are sprinkled about and colorful and tasty sauces are swirled, dotted and splashed on the plate to add pizzazz. A very common herb used for looks and flavor is parsley. Parsley used to be just laid on the side of the plate as garnish to dress up the plate. You don’t see much of that anymore, but for me it still makes the dinner special. I also like the taste of parsley and am one of those people that actually eat it because it tastes good and it makes my breath fresh. So why am I talking about parsley? This morning I made a yummy breakfast of chopped veggies and eggs with a great cup of coffee. As I wandered out to my patio to eat, I realized I could have dressed it up with some of the parsley growing in my garden and make it even more tasty and special. With just a bit more effort, I could treat myself like company. I should add more garnish to my life. I am pretty good at taking care of myself and enjoying my free time, but I could improve the quality of the little time off I have. This doesn’t have to happen every day, just once in awhile and especially when I am drained and need recharging. It should be a priority for me to take care of me. Does this sound selfish? The first rule in First-Aid is to take care of yourself so you can care for others. At times I’ve lost my temper or was short with someone and it was because I was not taking care of myself and meeting my needs. I was tired, hungry or overwhelmed and didn’t have the ability to listen, be patient or be concerned for someone else. I am usually good at recognizing when I need to recharge and take time for me, but now I’ve realized that I can do it a little better. What does this mean? Well, for one, putting parsley on my eggs once in awhile. Buying myself flowers every so often or taking myself out to dinner. I would do these things for someone else, so why not for me? I learned a very powerful lesson years ago when I had just separated from my husband. I was so depressed that for a month I hardly got out of bed. I could barely function. I wasn’t eating and wasn’t taking the best care of my son, who was a toddler at the time. On my first trip to the grocery store I had no idea what to buy. I was there for over an hour and left with a can of tuna fish and some frozen grape juice, things I ate all my life so these were easy choices. During my marriage I had been so focused on my husband’s and son’s needs that I had forgotten what I liked to eat. I had lost myself somewhere along the way in my marriage and needed to recover me. I came up with the idea of getting a manicure and pedicure. It was one of the most decadent things I could think of and at twenty-six I had never had the experience. Sitting in the chair with my feet soaking and my fingers being polished I suddenly felt like a queen! I had never experienced that feeling before and made up my mind I was going to make this feeling a part of my life. I smiled for the first time in a long while and this helped me get back on my feet and functioning again. It was a much needed garnish. As a massage therapist, I have several clients that understand this concept and others that only come in when they are hurting so bad they can’t function. I talk to people about taking care of themselves, whether it is having regular massage, doing regular exercise, meditating, or other ways they can recharge themselves. Yesterday I had a client come in for a massage who is in the midst of a divorce, helping a son recover from addiction to drugs and alcohol and facing some major changes in her job due to the sale of the company she works for. She is doing her best to meet her needs and looking for ways to recharge and be ready before picking up her son from a recovery center this week. This client is learning how to garnish. So, eat dessert at the fancy restaurant, make time for fun and positive friends, get your nails done, buy yourself flowers, paint your toes, soak in the tub with a glass of wine and candles, take a Sunday nap, take a day off and spend it with a loved one, snuggle with your pet. This is just a short list of things that are not necessary but can dress up your day and make the difference in how you feel about yourself and what you give to others. Add some garnish to your life! I would love to hear how you have done something special for yourself that made a difference in your day or your life. How have you garnished your life lately? Recently I had a woman come in for a massage session that was suffering from pain in her neck, upper back and lower back that she said she had been dealing with for about 7 months. She had had MRIs and x-rays that showed nothing wrong and doctors suggested pain pills. She had gone to acupuncture and had massage with little improvement and was really struggling with anxiety as a result of worry and pain. During the interview I asked where the pain was, what she thought might be causing it and also asked what was going on in her life 7-9 months ago, before the pain. I asked about her family and her relationship with her husband and children. She also mentioned that her religion is a big part of her life and very important to her. She had a great marriage with a very supportive husband and children. She had had no big changes in her life 7-9 months ago and was at a loss as to what was the cause. I explained that I thought we needed to get her in a relaxed state and then start addressing the areas with pain and see what was going on. This is not an unusual case. I see many clients, men and women, that have unexplained and chronic pain and are looking for answers. They have been to the doctors, had tests, been given medication and either found no relief or little change in the problem. I have another client that is in her seventies and suffers debilitating neck pain. Watching her move and her posture told me that there was some trauma involved but I kept this to myself. In getting to know her better and talking about her life, I learned that as a child her mother would yell at her and grab her by her neck when she was angry at her. The client had tears run down her face as she realized there was a connection. My theory is based only on my own experience and what I have seen with clients over that last several years… We are a whole being, not to be limited by being labeled by a pain or an injury or a disease. When something can’t be labeled or diagnosed, then the person is sometimes told that it is “in your head” and is not taken seriously. When something begins on a physical level, it actually started on a mental or emotional level as an experience; trauma, tragedy, emotion or thought. In some cases it started with an injury and then the emotional and mental aspects start forming around it. I have had friends and clients that have been cancer victims and survivors and in my experience, I see cancer as an emotional disease; Grief or loss in the breasts, anxiety or being overwhelmed in the brain, deep lack of self-esteem or abuse in the genitals. In my work with those in pain, I see bodies in physical hyper vigilance as if preparing for attack/stress and many times these people are disconnected in some way with their own body. Peter Levine is well known for his work on Somatic Experiencing and healing trauma. In his book, “Waking the Tiger”, he talks about how animals, such as a gazelle being chased by a cheetah, will immobilize or “freeze” just before being attacked. This is an instinctive state, one of three states of mammals and reptiles. The other two are flight or fight. This immobile state is actually part of survival. Also known as “playing possum”, some predators will think the impala dead and not eat the impala, or may drag the prey off and hide it for later and the Impala will awaken and escape. In this immobile state it also will not experience pain and will not suffer if attacked and eaten. If the impala escapes, it will actually shake off the effects of this state and continue on without any lasting effects. Trauma is part of life on earth. It cannot be avoided. Trauma can be in any form; verbal, emotional or physical, from birth to death we have trauma as small as smashing your finger with a hammer or as large as near death experiences. However, we feel shame at our perceived ability to handle what comes into our lives and don’t allow ourselves to move progressive through the natural stages to release the effects and move on. We also create more pain and suffering by our thoughts and “self talk”. We feel like we are lacking on some level and become “stuck” emotionally, mentally, spiritually and eventually physically. Many Eastern systems of healing and Shamanic practices believe that the organs and systems of the body hold emotions and experiences and when out of balance will suffer pain and “dis-ease”. Dis-ease being the body out of ease within. One good sample of this belief is Louise L. Hay’s book, “You Can Heal Your Life”. She shares her story of healing “incurable” vaginal cancer. She suffered sexual abuse from a young age until she was fifteen and led a life of pain and suffering until she was able to find the way to heal herself mentally and emotionally and then the healing happened on a physical level and her doctors were amazed at no cancer in her body six months after her diagnosis. In her book, she discusses the effects that life experiences can have on us physically and how we can move through these experiences in a healthy way and/or address issues that are creating dis-ease or pain. She also lists body parts and possible connections to emotions and beliefs and how these beliefs and emotions can affect us on the physical level. In my own life, I have seen miracles. When I was a young girl, my mother was diagnosed with uterine cancer and through much prayer and fasting of our family and church, the cancer was gone. I believe my mother needed to know she was loved and needed. Her marriage was loveless and our home was violent and I believe she saw herself as unloved and worthless. After her healing, she divorced my father and was able to build a better and happier life for all of us. With massage I am able to help reconnect people with their bodies and relieve pain temporarily, but I also find that massage is only a small part of what goes on when working with some clients. Interviewing and probing help uncover sources of injury or emotions that can be connected to what is happening in their bodies. By them being able to make the connection it helps uncover the root of the problem and get them on the road to permanent recovery from pain. Brachial Plexus Impingement and Subscapularus Spasm WOW! Try to say that ten times fast! Let me interpret that for you…you know that pain you feel that goes down the back of your arm and/or sits right under your shoulder blade and sometimes goes up into your neck? That’s what I’m talking about! I have had several people come in this last two weeks with this problem. As you can see from the photo, there is a bundle of nerves on either side of your neck that live between some little muscles called Scalenes. If Scalenes get tight they can pinch those nerves or if you have been swimming, throwing, pushing or pulling heavy things or slouching at your desk, (as I just caught myself doing), the muscle underneath your shoulder blade gets tight and can squeeze that nerve too. This is also an injury that can happen at birth when a babies shoulders are compressed coming out of the mother. It can also happen as a football injury or in auto accidents when the shoulder is hit hard from the front or side. This is when you come to me and say, “Ouch! It hurts on the back of my shoulder and down my arm”. I even had one guy that was scheduled for Carpal Tunnel surgery talk to me and with about 15 minutes of Trigger Point, the pain and tingling went away and he cancelled his surgery…WHEW! So when you make these body parts angry, what can you do to appease the muscle gods and make the pain go away? STRETCH! You’ve heard me talk about “grabbing a wall” and that is what it is literally. Take your hand and place it flat on the wall with fingers facing behind you. Keep the arm straight and turn slowly away from your hand. You will feel stretching of your chest muscles and this will help relax the muscles of the back and open space between ribs and shoulder blades. I demonstrate this stretch here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_jEQb1cg4Uw You can also place your hands on either side of a doorway, just a little higher than your head and slowly move forward. This will stretch chest muscles and open up the space between shoulder blades and ribs too. Treatment for this is Trigger Point done around the scapula and is a specialty of mine, as some of you have experienced and I can help release the pain. It isn’t comfortable, but the treatment is VERY affective! Are you single, married, dating? Do you live at home, with someone else or alone? Do you have children or are taking care of a relative and/or elderly person? Do you work full-time or part-time? Do you volunteer or help out around your neighborhood or community? Well, let me ask you this…Did you get touched today? I mean physically touched without anything required of you? Did someone give you a hug just because or to offer their love and support? Too often, no matter what your circumstances, you weren’t touched at all today or maybe for several days and this can affect your health physically and mentally. Touch is vital to our survival as humans, regardless of age. In 1915, James H.M. Knox of Johns Hopkins Hospital reported that babies left in orphanages and given proper nutrition died at a rate of about 90 percent. Other studies of the same era confirmed these findings and showed that those babies who did survive were often mentally handicapped and stunted in their growth. These valuable studies helped institutions understand the importance of touch. When staff was added to provide enough time for each child to be held, handled, and touched, mortality rates dropped dramatically. Those early statistical studies showed how vital touch is to developing infants. Researchers are also finding that giving massage to premature infants can improve their growth and overall health. A study conducted by the Touch Research Institute (TRI) at the University of Miami found that when stable premature babies were given five, one-minute massages a day, they gained 47 percent more weight than their counterparts who didn't get massage. Many massage schools now offer courses in neonatal massage, and most hospitals include some kind of program to introduce nurturing touch to hospitalized infants. In the U.S., nurses, therapists, and parents are trained to give massage to premature babies so they get the necessary stimulation for optimal development without stressing their delicate systems. While most infant studies involve preemies, a 2001 study conducted by TRI showed that when mothers gave their infants a 15-minute massage before bedtime, these sleep-challenged children went to sleep more quickly and were more alert during daytime hours. The list of studies goes on and on, but what's most important to remember is that infants need touch to develop healthy nervous systems. From the time my son was small, I gave him back rubs before tucking him into bed at night, especially when he wasn’t feeling well or had a bad day and it would help him relax enough to go to sleep. He suffers from asthma and many times just gently rubbing his back, neck and shoulders would calm him down enough to ease his breathing. He still loves having his back rubbed in order to relax and is especially happy that his mother has become a massage therapist. As children grow up, they continue to need touch, but as they get older they get nurturing touch less and less. Boys especially suffer touch deprivation that begins much earlier than for girls, typically. Many school systems forbid teachers from touching students for fear of litigation and the busy lifestyles of children and working parents often keep children from getting the touch they need and behavior problems can result. Clinical research and sociological studies have linked touch deprivation with aggression. A 2002 study reported that adolescents with a history of aggressive behavior showed less aggression and were less anxious after receiving a 20-minute massage twice a week for five weeks. Massage also reduces the symptoms of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder so children can concentrate better, and it's even been found that the right kind of touch can help children with autism relate better to teachers and family members. Massage is on the increase at hospitals and clinics that treat many types of physical, emotional and mental challenges for children. Ongoing research by The Touch Research Institute continues to prove that massage is an important therapy for many conditions. After a massage, levels of the stress hormone cortisol drop in saliva tests and examinations show an improvement in alertness and relaxation, depression scores decrease, and mental focus improves. The exponential growth of the bodywork field is a testament to the value of safe, therapeutic touch. Of course bodywork can play an essential role in the healing of specific chronic or acute orthopedic conditions, but it also serves as a powerful aide in improving the quality of life for adults. Interesting to note that in 2008, massage, as an industry grew even when most other industries were suffering in the midst of an economic crises. This reflects that stress levels were high and people were seeking healthy ways of relieving it. We often equate the need for physical closeness with the need for sex, but anyone who's been in a close, long-term relationship understands that as time goes by sex becomes less frequent, however the need for nurturing touch remains strong. For those not in a relationship, massage can be a healthy way to get that much-needed human contact. Isolation, loss of loved ones, loss of home and independence -- we often think of these things as primary causes of depression in the elderly, but what about the loss of human touch? People confined to nursing homes rarely get more than daily hygienic care and the stigma of touching elders contributes to their physical isolation. Elders need touch as much as infants, studies show that when they receive regular massage, the elderly have less depression and anxiety, experience better physical coordination, and show a decrease of stress hormone in their saliva. One study showed that elders who participated as volunteer grandparents in a program to give massage to abused infants experienced the same benefits as when they themselves received massage. Simply by giving touch, they were able to improve their own health. In fact, many hospitals recruit the elderly to give touch to premature and sick infants by rocking them for several minutes each day and both experience the benefits. Geriatric massage is a growing field requiring specialized training and many massage therapists offer it in their practices. Some nursing homes now provide massage to their residents. In my own work, I have an elderly client that is home bound and also going through chemo therapy. With light massage, they are able to rest and sleep better. Their spouse died a couple of years ago and just giving a head and neck massage helps with their loneliness and depression and eases their anxiety. We are wired to need to touch, we need to be touched. In the early months before babies learn about their hands, feet, toes and fingers, they need the touch of parents, caregivers, and family to develop and we retain that need our entire lives. Most women will agree that they are guilty of putting themselves last when they typically are working full-time, caring for a family and sometimes an older relative. This also applies to stay-at-home dads too. However, the first rule in first-aid is to take care of yourself first, so you can be there to take care of others. I have many female clients that come in for massage only because the pain has become so unbearable that they have little choice in order to keep taking care of others. So, let’s skip the lecture, because I’m sure you’ve heard it before, how you should take better care of yourself. Massage can be a very effective way to care for yourself and let me just list a few of the many benefits: · Assist in tissue repair and healthy scar formation · Promotes good joint mobility, flexibility and proper alignment · Reduce muscle stiffness, tension and pain · Improve circulatory and lymphatic function · Decrease blood pressure and increase blood cell circulation · Increased mental clarity, reduced anxiety and increase feelings of general well being. So this is all fine and good, but what to do between massages to meet our need for touch? Hug someone! Yes, a full body (not the barely touching with a little pat on the back kind of hug), where you wrap them in your arms, is a wonderful way to feel good and make someone’s day. Years ago, I had a friend that was a “hugger”. She would hug anyone and everyone, it didn’t matter. The day she hugged the man that would later become my husband, I decided I was giving this hugging thing a try. It was a bit scary at first and felt awkward, but the more I hugged, the more I got hugged and it felt great! I came from a home where touch was not part of our family unless you were getting disciplined. In fact, I never saw my parents touch unless they were making up after a major fight and it was uncomfortable to see them touch, either hugging or holding hands. It isn’t surprising that they divorced and went on to live the same unhappy patterns. Now, as I stated before, touch is necessary for our survival as humans. Dr. Leo Buscaglia or better known as “Dr. Love”, in the 1980’s said, “Hugs make you happier” and he taught about love and emotions and connecting with others. He wrote several best-selling books on love and connecting. Several years ago, I had a business in a strip mall and two doors down was an Italian restaurant that was owned by a couple. Carole was always there first thing in the morning and we made a “hug pact”. Every day either she came to my shop or I went to hers and we shared a hug. Even now, twelve years later, I miss her hugs. However, I try to reach out to as many as possible and especially the elderly and give them a hug. I usually hug each client as they leave just because it feels natural and it lets them know I care. I am single and don’t get touched and a hug is a gift for them and for myself. Many of us have it in our nature to care for others, but we can do it better and be more effective if we care for ourselves, first. Massage can be the necessary nurturing touch you need, to be healthier and happier in your life, but a hug will get you by until then too. Hug your children. Rub their backs before they fall asleep. Touch and hug those around you and let them know you care. Try it and see what changes happen. |
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